From the Depths of Sorrow is a series in which I reveal my heart and personal journey through my grief. Our son, William, passed away at age 11 months and 10 days on April 24, 2012. He is dearly missed by everyone in our family and we hope to live a life worthy of reuniting with him and our first child that we lost through miscarriage.
Fruits of Sorrow
There is fruit from sorrow and suffering. When a person chooses to accept the suffering as God’s will, then a fruit of holiness lives within that person. I am by no means declaring myself to be holy; rather that the potential for growth in holiness is made available to all of us when we accept God’s will.
One need not suffer from a great catastrophic event to tap into this desire for holiness. It means accepting the daily mishaps, inconveniences, and difficulties that are present to us all. Each moment we are given a choice to respond to events that are not our choosing or ideal situation. Choosing holiness will be easy sometimes but when it is hard then the greater growth in our spiritual lives can occur.
To stop living for the desires of oneself and to live for the desires of He who created us sets us on a path to holiness. Holiness is not something that is achieved and checked off the list in this life. It is a journey that leads us closer to our Heavenly goal. Sometimes we take steps backwards in this journey and this should always be a learning experience.
The great thing about suffering is that it reminds us of our dependency on Christ. We need His help to resist the temptations that come so easily. The temptations to complain about how life is not fair, or that we deserve better, or we’ve worked so hard and it seems to make no difference- can turn us towards our self and away from Christ.
He is a model of suffering for us all and we need only look at a crucifix to see that there is great fruit to be found in suffering. In my deep sorrow, when my heart aches in pain, and I can’t imagine anything hurting worse than I feel at that moment- then I am given a choice. Do I rebel and get angry or do I let suffering cover me completely? In that soaking, that drenching of the soul in agony, I am cleansed. I feel an outpouring of all that is me with sin, ugliness, and vice and I am left weak and dependent only on God.
Sorrow has brought me to a closer relationship with Christ. I am thankful for that fruit.Psalm 34:18 The Lord is near to the broken hearted, and saves the crushed in spirit.
Suffering in whatever magnitude will occur in your life, use it to grow in holiness and for the good of others. Don’t miss the opportunity to offer your spilled milk, wrecked car, or injury, to unite yourself with Christ. You will taste the fruit.2 Timothy 2:3 Share in suffering as a good soldier for Christ Jesus.
United With Christ
by Veronica Wallace
I walk into Gethsemane
To take my place in agony
Sorrow comes so readily
Embraces my fidelity
My turn to spend and take my share
Prepare my soul for cross to bear
Lay down my heart for him to tear
Eternal life to give repair
by Veronica Wallace
Today I went down to the Garden
To cry for my soul
I joined with Him who sorrows
For whom the bell tolls
He brought all humanity
The agony was crushing
I brought just my one
My misery was nothing
The blood came from the anguish
My soul laid out dead
He mourned the lost souls
My soul safe in heaven